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Re: The 'user' in User Manual

Subject: Re: The 'user' in User Manual
From: Steve Read <steve -at- readonly -dot- com>
To: Lauren <lt34 -at- csus -dot- edu>
Date: Mon, 12 Feb 2007 14:14:16 -0700

At the very first login ever in history by anyone? By using "the first time you login," that ambiguity disappears.

Steve

Lauren wrote:

I would avoid the pronouns and the passive voice.

"The system displays the new user welcome message at the first login."

Lauren
-----Original Message-----
From: techwr-l-bounces+lt34=csus -dot- edu -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com [mailto:techwr-l-bounces+lt34=csus -dot- edu -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com] On Behalf Of Tara Charter
Sent: Monday, February 12, 2007 9:26 AM
To: Techwr-l
Subject: Re: The 'user' in User Manual

4th: "Upon initial login, the system displays the new user welcome message."

Sarah Bouchier wrote:

In my opinion, using 'you" in instructions sounds like verbally
stabbing
a
finger at the reader. In some contexts, and to some
people, that is
not rude. In others, however, it is.
I think we're all agreed that instructions should use the
imperative
:) In my experience, however, it's not in the actual instructions where the need to actually pick 1st, 2nd or 3rd person
creeps in, it's
in the descriptive or conditional bits round the edges.
For example:
2nd: "The first time you log in, you will see the new user welcome message."
3rd: "The first time the user logs in, they will see the new user welcome message."
Passive: "Upon initial login, the new user welcome message will be presented."

None of them are +wrong+, but as a user I'd be more
comfortable with
the first.

-----------------------------------------
Sarah Bouchier
Technical Author

exony
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References:
RE: The 'user' in User Manual: From: Lauren

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