HAGerwocky (longish but worth it)

Subject: HAGerwocky (longish but worth it)
From: Patrick O'Connell <patricko -at- EICON -dot- COM>
Date: Fri, 25 Mar 1994 15:59:00 PST

God only knows why, but I was inspired to write a parody of the well-known
Lewis Carroll poem Jabberwocky for those authoring Windows help. The 'HAG'
in the title is from the standard appellation around here for the MS Windows
Help Authoring Guide. Enjoy, and note this is version 1.0 only; suggestions
for improvements are welcome. For purposes of comparison and for those
who've never ready Jabberwocky, the original may be found beneath its
ill-begotten offspring.

HAGerwocky
by Pat O'Connell
(with apologies to Lewis Carroll)

'Twas morning, and the context strings,
Prepared, were mapped all one-to-one,
With each a unique number
For the deed soon to be done.

"Beware the Projectfile, my son!
HCP errors that come back!
Beware topics not found, and shun
The wanton macro hack!"

He took his Auth'ring Guide in hand,
Long time the clean compile he sought--
So he rested in the corporate caf,
And chewed awhile in thought.

And as the sun approached demise,
The Projectfile, all sections set
And, muscles tensed, his breathing short
His brow now damps with sweat!

Compile! Compile! And all the while
The Auth'ring Guide clutched to his breast
He let it run, and one by one
The source-files it processed.

Hast not compiled the Projectfile?
Find thee the errors straight away!
O cursed hour! His mood turned sour
And stayed thus for the day.

'Twas evening, and the context strings
Prepared, were mapped all one-to-one,
With each a unique number
For the deed soon to be done.


Jabberwocky
Lewis Carroll

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimst were the borogroves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome fow he sought--
So he rested by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
And whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker - snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms by beamish boy!
O frabious day! Callooh! Callay!
He chortled in his joy.

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimst were the borogroves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.


PatO'
.-------------------------------------------------------------------.
|Patrick Brian O'Connell | Intermediate Technical Writer|
|Internet: patricko -at- eicon -dot- com | Eicon Technology Corporation|
|Tel: (B) 514-631-9825 x250 | 2196 32nd Ave. Lachine, Quebec,|
| (H) 514-482-9279 | Canada, H8T 3H7|
.-------------------------------------------------------------------.
| "COGITO EGGO SUM - I think; therefore, I am a waffle." |
`-------------------------------------------------------------------'


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