Re: Grammar (again!)

[Deborah Hemstreet <dvora -at- tech-challenged -dot- com>]

Hi Lauren,

Thanks! You re correct, they wanted the all emphasized. As for the 
ellipses... no the sentence does not end there. I'm just sparing you all 
the agony of what IS there <grin>

Thanks again!

Deborah

Lauren wrote:
> I agree with your final choice, but I do not like the use of "all," unless
> that was emphasized for some marketing purpose, but I do like that it breaks
> up the sentence in two short phrases.  Brochure sentences should be rather
> brief, like your two phrases, since people are not reading for content.
> They want the gist of what it being sold.  Does the sentence really end in
> ellipses?  I don't like that.
>
> Lauren
>
>
>   
>> From: Deborah Hemstreet
>>     
>
>   
>> Thanks to you all for your comments and suggestions on this 
>> one. While 
>> not optimal, I believe the following text is now better:
>>
>> We have issued licenses for six technologies, all in various 
>> stages of 
>> development....
>>
>> Thanks to all (including those of you who replied off-list).
>>
>> Deborah
>> http://www.tech-challenged.com
>>
>>     
>
>
>
>   
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