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Subject:RE: The 'user' in User Manual From:"Lauren" <lt34 -at- csus -dot- edu> To:"'Combs, Richard'" <richard -dot- combs -at- Polycom -dot- com>, "'Techwr-l'" <techwr-l -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com> Date:Fri, 2 Feb 2007 22:31:50 -0800
I'm still not a grammarian. "Neutral Stance" as I used it was a concept
that I was trying to convey and not a grammatical rule. Neutrality is
necessary in technical writing. Grammar is used in all documentation.
Names of grammar rules are important when studying grammar, but I don't know
the names of the rules myself. Was the concept vague? Are you objecting to
the content of my message or the form? Is it really necessary to discuss
form over content?
My goal was to explain the different ways to say the same thing with
different voices and to make the point that a neutral voice produces better
writing. I did not mean to confuse people when I refered to concepts rather
than grammatical terms. I have no intentions of picking up a glossary of
grammar, so if there is a concept that I want to convey again and I do not
have the specific grammatical terms that people want to see, then I will
write with concepts rather than specific grammatical terms and some people
will need to resolve that within their own minds.
Lauren
-----Original Message-----
From: techwr-l-bounces+lt34=csus -dot- edu -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com
[mailto:techwr-l-bounces+lt34=csus -dot- edu -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com] On Behalf Of
Combs, Richard
Sent: Friday, February 02, 2007 3:02 PM
To: Techwr-l
Subject: RE: The 'user' in User Manual
Lauren wrote:
> connotation. I take a neutral stance in my writing and avoid 1st
> ("I"), 2nd ("you"), and 3rd ("user") person voices.
There's no such thing as a "stance" or "person voice" in grammar, there is
only "person." English has only three grammatical persons -- see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grammatical_person.
> How about a simple save file process as an example of the 4 stances?
>
> 1st - I click "File," "Save As," and choose a name for the file when I
> want to save the file.
>
> 2nd - You need to click "File," "Save As," and choose a name for the
> file when you want to save the file.
>
> 3rd - The user needs to click "File," "Save As," and choose a name for
> the file when he or she wants to save the file.
Fine examples of the three grammatical persons. Not stances.
> Neutral - Click "File," "Save As," and choose a name for the file to
> save the file.
As Andrew noted, this is just another example of the 2nd person. This time,
the verb is in the imperative mood, so the subject is "you" and is implied.
> literally impossible to tell who is doing what to whom! The primary
> reason for this is that the sentence is loaded with passive voice. In
> correcting this mess, without explicitly identifying to whom I am
> referring, it is very difficult to write a cohesive sentence about the
> procedure that I want the user to follow. In these cases, I tend to
> say "The Test Operator clicks here, the PC responds with this, the
> Unit Under Test does that..."
Address the reader! In your example, I sincerely doubt that the reader will
ever be the PC or the Unit Under Test, so you refer to them in the 3rd
person. Presumably, the Test Operator is your reader, so you refer to her or
him in the 2nd person. But if you're writing instructions for the Supervisor
who oversees the Test Operator, then you refer to the Test Operator in the
3rd person and address the Supervisor. Especially for procedural
information, you must identify the reader, and then address the reader.
Richard
------
Richard G. Combs
Senior Technical Writer
Polycom, Inc.
richardDOTcombs AT polycomDOTcom
303-223-5111
------
rgcombs AT gmailDOTcom
303-777-0436
------
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