Re: Gender neutral - any new developments in your neck of the woods?

Subject: Re: Gender neutral - any new developments in your neck of the woods?
From: Kirsten Zerbinis <salmonzerbinis -at- rogers -dot- com>
To: "TECHWR-L" <techwr-l -at- lists -dot- raycomm -dot- com>
Date: Mon, 3 Mar 2003 15:33:56 -0500


Yipes -- this reminds me of the arm-wrestling I did with my mother-in-law over addressing wedding invitations. She insisted that the correct thing to do was to only use Mrs. when you were also using the husband's name -- the whole name. As in, you could be Mrs. John Smith, *and* Ms. Jane Doe, but never Mrs. Jane Smith. And, she being from New England, she was able to put a disarming amount of conviction (and a prim, tight smile) behind her use of the word "correct".

She didn't win that battle, but I still feel weird about the concession that her 80-year-old, spinster aunt be referred to as Ms. Spinster Aunt. New England, remember, and 80. I can't imagine she expected any form of address except for "Miss".

Myself, I solve the gender-neutral problem with a steadfast use of the second-person. It forces the active voice, it allows for a comfortable but not breezy informality, and I never have to spend another moment thinking "Well, the OED says using 'they' as a singular neuter pronoun is okay, but I hate it and it's stupid. And only editors, tech writers, and English professors pay attention to the OED anyway. What to do?"

-Kirsten Zerbinis

On Monday, March 3, 2003, at 02:15 PM, Rock, Megan wrote:


Not to drag this even further off-topic, but what is the correct usage of Ms.? A friend of mine who is divorced but still goes by her married surname told me that she is supposed to use "Ms. Smith" because her ex-husband remarried and his new wife is now the "Mrs. Smith."

Megan Rock
Technical Specialist
FANUC Robotics America, Inc.
http://www.fanucrobotics.com


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RE: Gender neutral - any new developments in your neck of the woods?: From: Rock, Megan

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